var Quotation=new Array() // do not change this! Quotation[ 0 ]=" In Alabama, prison guards are forbidden from referring to their spouses as 'the old ball 'n' chain.' "; Quotation[ 1 ]=" In Los Angeles, it's illegal for a waiter to tell a customer 'I'm really an actor.' "; Quotation[ 2 ]=" In Indiana, it's against the law to dress 'Barbie' in 'Ken's' clothes. "; Quotation[ 3 ]=" In Sedona, Arizona, it's illegal to lie about your astrological sign. "; Quotation[ 4 ]=" In Texas, it's illegal to threaten somebody with an UNLOADED gun. "; Quotation[ 5 ]=" In Samoa, it's a crime to forget your wife's birthday. "; Quotation[ 6 ]=" In Australia, it's illegal to name any animal you plan to eat. "; Quotation[ 7 ]=" In Cannes, France, it's illegal to wear a Jerry Lewis mask. "; Quotation[ 8 ]=" In New Jersey, answering a traffic cop who asks 'Do you know why I pulled you over?' by saying, 'If you don't know, I'm not going to tell you' is an automatic $300 fine. "; Quotation[ 9 ]=" In Kentucky, it's illegal to paint your lawn red. "; Quotation[ 10 ]=" In Portugal, it's against the law to pee in the ocean. "; Quotation[ 11 ]=" In Connecticut, night watchmen are forbidden from drinking decaf coffee while working. "; Quotation[ 12 ]=" In Vermont, it's illegal to pick your nose and stick the pickings under a table. "; Quotation[ 13 ]=" In Tennessee, it's illegal to tell someone to quit smoking. "; Quotation[ 14 ]=" In Oregon, donut holes must be at least an 1/8th inch in diameter. "; Quotation[ 15 ]=" In Georgia, it's illegal to teach a child under 5 the words 'penis' and 'vagina.'"; Quotation[ 16 ]=" Unmarried women are not allowed to buy edible panties in South Carolina. "; Quotation[ 17 ]=" In Italy, anyone considered 'obese' is forbidden from wearing polyester. "; Quotation[ 18 ]=" It's illegal to tear a phone book in half in Montana. "; Quotation[ 19 ]=" Anyone caught selling a 'smoothie' that has lumps is breaking the law in California. "; Quotation[ 20 ]=" In Arkansas, it's illegal for a woman getting married for the second time to wear a white wedding gown. "; Quotation[ 21 ]=" In Pennsylvania, it's against the law to put a dollar on a string on the ground and yank it when someone tries to pick it up. "; Quotation[ 22 ]=" In New York City, it's illegal for a restaurant to call it a 'corned beef sandwich' if it's made with white bread and mayonnaise. "; Quotation[ 23 ]=" In Sweden, while prostitution is legal, it is illegal for anyone to use the services of a prostitute. "; Quotation[ 24 ]=" In Jasmine, Saskatchewan, it is illegal for a cow to moo within 300 km of a private home. "; Quotation[ 25 ]=" It is illegal, in Malaysia, for restaurants to substitute toilet paper as table napkins. Repeat offenders go to jail. "; Quotation[ 26 ]=" In Indiana, it is illegal to ride public transportation for at least 30 minutes after eating garlic. "; Quotation[ 27 ]=" In Athens, Greece, a driver's license can be taken away by law if the driver is deemed either 'unbathed' or 'poorly dressed'. "; Quotation[ 28 ]=" Duelling in Paraguay is legal as long as both parties are registered blood donors. "; Quotation[ 29 ]=" According to a British law passed in 1845, attempting to commit suicide was a capital offence. Offenders could be hanged for trying. "; Quotation[ 30 ]=" Scotland - It is illegal to be possession of a cow while under the influence of drink. "; Quotation[ 31 ]=" Scotland - If someone comes to your house and asks to use of your commode, you must let them enter. "; Quotation[ 32 ]=" A Member of Parliament must not enter the House of Commons in London wearing a full suit of armour. "; Quotation[ 33 ]=" England - Committing suicide is classified as a capital crime – punishable by death. "; Quotation[ 34 ]=" England - Sticking a postage stamp, bearing the Queens portrait, upside down on an envelope is an act of treason. "; Quotation[ 35 ]=" In Chester, UK, you are allowed to shoot a Welsh person with a bow and arrow provided it is done inside the city walls and after midnight. "; Quotation[ 36 ]=" France - Between the hours of 8AM and 8PM, the music played by radio stations must be a minimum of 70% by French artists. "; Quotation[ 37 ]=" In France - Pigs must not be called Napoleon. "; Quotation[ 38 ]=" Kissing on French railways is illegal. "; Quotation[ 39 ]=" In Italy a man may be imprisoned for wearing a skirt. "; Quotation[ 40 ]=" In Singapore it is illegal to perform oral sex unless it is part of foreplay leading to full sex. "; Quotation[ 41 ]=" Anyone not flushing a public toilet in Singapore may receive a large fine. "; Quotation[ 42 ]=" Singapore - A person convicted of littering three times, will have to clean the streets on Sundays wearing a sign saying 'I am a litter lout' "; Quotation[ 43 ]=" Singapore - Relieving yourself in an elevator is particularly forbidden. "; Quotation[ 44 ]=" Prostitution is legal in Sweden, but using the services of a prostitute is illegal. – Must make trade rather difficult! "; Quotation[ 45 ]=" South Korea - Traffic police are required to report all bribes that they receive from motorists. "; Quotation[ 46 ]=" Switzerland - After 10 P.M. a man may not relieve himself while standing up. "; Quotation[ 47 ]=" Australia - All taxi cabs must carry a bale of hay in the trunk. "; Quotation[ 48 ]=" In Victoria only licensed electricians may change a light bulb. "; Quotation[ 49 ]=" In Victoria it is illegal to wear pink pants after midday on a Sunday. "; Quotation[ 50 ]=" In Toronto it is illegal to drag a dead horse down Yonge Street on a Sunday. "; Quotation[ 51 ]=" In China it is illegal to go to college unless you are intelligent. "; Quotation[ 52 ]=" In China, rescuing a drowning person is not allowed as it would be interfering with their fate. "; Quotation[ 53 ]=" Denmark - Attempting to escape from prison is not illegal, however, if caught, the person must serve out the remainder of his term. "; Quotation[ 54 ]=" In most Middle Eastern countries following Islamic law is enforced: 'After having sexual relations with a lamb, it is a mortal sin to eat its flesh.' "; Quotation[ 55 ]=" In Lebanon, it is legal for men to have sex with female animals. However, having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death. "; Quotation[ 56 ]=" In Indonesia the penalty for masturbation is decapitation. "; Quotation[ 57 ]=" In Hong Kong a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, provided she does so with her bare hands. The husband's lover, quite rightfully, may be killed in any desired way. "; Quotation[ 58 ]=" In Singapore, it is against the law to not flush the toilet after using it. Special police randomly check on public restrooms and violators are publicly caned. "; Quotation[ 59 ]=" Only blood donors are allowed to duel in Uruguay. "; Quotation[ 60 ]=" Alaska law says that you can't look at a moose from an airplane. "; Quotation[ 61 ]=" In Corpus Christie, Texas, it is illegal to raise alligators in your home. "; Quotation[ 62 ]=" In Miami, it is forbidden to imitate an animal. "; Quotation[ 63 ]=" In Illinois, the law is that a car must be driven with the steering wheel. "; Quotation[ 64 ]=" California law prohibits a woman from driving a car while dressed in a housecoat. "; Quotation[ 65 ]=" In Memphis, Tennessee, a woman is not to drive a car unless a man warns approaching motorists or pedestrians by walking in front of the car that is being driven. "; Quotation[ 66 ]=" In Tennessee, it is against the law to drive a car while sleeping. "; Quotation[ 67 ]=" In New York, it is against the law for a blind person to drive an automobile. "; Quotation[ 68 ]=" In West Virginia, only babies can ride in a baby carriage. "; Quotation[ 69 ]=" In Rochester, Michigan, the law is that anyone bathing in public must have the bathing suit inspected by a police officer. "; Quotation[ 70 ]=" In Kentucky, it's the law that a person must take a bath once a year. "; Quotation[ 71 ]=" In Utah, birds have the right of way on any public highway. "; Quotation[ 72 ]=" In Ohio, one must have a license to keep a bear. "; Quotation[ 73 ]=" In Tennessee, a law exists which prohibits the sale of bologna (sandwich meat) on Sunday. "; Quotation[ 74 ]=" In Virginia, the Code of 1930 has a statute which prohibits corrupt practices or bribery by any person other than political candidates. "; Quotation[ 75 ]=" In Providence, Rhode Island, it is against the law to jump off a bridge. "; Quotation[ 76 ]=" In the State of Kansas, you're not allowed to drive a buffalo through a street. "; Quotation[ 77 ]=" In Florida, it is against the law to put livestock on a school bus. "; Quotation[ 78 ]=" In New Jersey, cabbage can't be sold on Sunday. "; Quotation[ 79 ]=" In Galveston, Texas, it is illegal to have a camel run loose in the street. "; Quotation[ 80 ]=" In Cleveland, Ohio, it is unlawful to leave chewing gum in public places. "; Quotation[ 81 ]=" In Virginia, chickens cannot lay eggs before 8:00 a.m., and must be done before 4:00 p.m. "; Quotation[ 82 ]=" In New York, it is against the law for children to pick up or collect cigarette and cigar butts. "; Quotation[ 83 ]=" In Massachusetts, it is against the law to put tomatos in clam chowder. "; Quotation[ 84 ]=" In Washington State, you can't carry a concealed weapon that is over 6 feet in length. "; Quotation[ 85 ]=" In San Francisco, there is an ordinance, which bans the picking up and throwing of used confetti. "; Quotation[ 86 ]=" In Kentucky, it is illegal for a merchant to force a person into his place of business for the purpose of making a sale. "; Quotation[ 87 ]=" It is against the law in Connecticut for a man to write love letters to a girl whose mother or father has forbidden the relationship. "; Quotation[ 88 ]=" In Michigan, married couples must live together or be imprisoned. "; Quotation[ 89 ]=" In Phoenix, Arizona, you can't walk through a hotel lobby with spurs on. "; Quotation[ 90 ]=" In California, a law created in 1925 makes it illegal to wiggle while dancing. "; Quotation[ 91 ]=" In Utah, daylight must be visible between dancing couples. "; Quotation[ 92 ]=" In Michigan, it is against the law for a lady to lift her skirt more than 6 inches while walking through a mud puddle. "; Quotation[ 93 ]=" In North Carolina, it is against the law for a rabbit to race down the street. "; Quotation[ 94 ]=" In Georgia, it's against the law to spread a false rumor. "; Quotation[ 95 ]=" In West Virginia, one can't cook sauerkraut or cabbage due to the odors and the offence is subject to imprisonment. "; Quotation[ 96 ]=" In Missouri, a man must have a permit to shave. "; Quotation[ 97 ]=" The law states that more than 3000 sheep cannot be herded down Hollywood Blvd. at any one time. "; Quotation[ 98 ]=" In Texas, it is still a 'hanging offense' to steal cattle. "; Quotation[ 99 ]=" In Jackson, Wyoming it is against the law to spit on the sidewalks or in the streets. If you spit on sidewalks or streets in front of a lady and she is offended, you must be arrested and jailed for no more than three days and pay restitution to the woman. "; // ====================================== // Do not change anything below this line // ====================================== var today = new Date(); today = today.getDate(); var Q = Quotation.length; var whichQuotation=Math.round(Math.random(today)*(Q-1)); function showQuotation(){document.write(Quotation[whichQuotation]);} showQuotation();